The Lost Charm

"Excuse me, can you tell me where I can find the 'fiction' section?"

"yes, it is the fourth rack from front on the left side."

"Thank you."

"You are welcome."

These are the only few words that Nina speaks. Rest of the time, she is painfully still and silent.Working at the local library is therefore, an easy task for her. All she has to do is remain silent and arrange books. Her expressions resemble those of the sages whose lives are blessed with ultimate content and tranquility. But those are her expressions. What lies inside, nobody can tell.

Everyday, a lot of readers come to the library, read books, get them issued, return the ones they have read or found unable to read, and at the end of the day, there books are placed in wrong sections or simply left on the table. It's closing time. Nina starts picking up books and placing them in racks where they belong. This is, perhaps, the only time when she has nothing, except books, in mind.

She bends down and places a book. Then she climbs up ladder to place another. But something has caught her eye and she drops the book in hand. It is a rose with a tag that says "To Nina". She stares at it. Her expressions are unchanged, but her thoughts are not. She quickly picks up the flower, climbs down and throws it into the dustbin, as if it was going to explode.

Today is another usual day. The same things to be done, the same words to be spoken. But something has changed. The thought of a rose makes her heart thump within her chest. "Poor joke", she tells herself and dumps the thought the same way she had dumped the flower.

The library closes and she gets up to arrange books. Subconsciously, she decides to arrange books in the rack, where she had found a flower yesterday, first. She finds nothing, says "poor joke" with a sigh, and returns to her task. Just when she takes a last round, she notices a paper sticking out of a book. She hurries towards the book to fix it. But it is no paper. It is a card that says "Your smile is beautiful". This reminds her she hasn't smiled for months. Again, a "poor joke" and she tears it into four pieces, looks at it one last time and throws it into the dustbin.

"Where can I find Mario Puzo?"

"I'll show you. Come with me."

Today, she walks to racks to show readers the books they are looking for. Some of the readers look at her amazed when she offers to help them this way. But her expressions remain unchanged. 

Today she finds a chocolate bar that she gives to the little boy who begs at the traffic light and a bunch of lilies, the next day, that she places in her drawer and leaves.

Her expressions remain unchanged, but people have started noticing changes. Suddenly, her vocabulary seems to have increased.

"Do you have Jeffrey Archer?"

"Of course, we do....come I'll show you."

"Thanks"

"No problem. I'm glad I could help."

She finds a little pendant that she wears to work the next day.

"This is the first time I am seeing you wearing a piece of jewel. You look pretty.", some tell her.

She feels like a teenage girl, enjoying compliments. She doesn't remember the last time she wanted to look good. But now she does. She takes more time to get ready for work now. People can't help telling her how prettier she looks now.

Today she finds a CD of songs that she had long forgotten that she loved so much. She went home and played them on her music player. Her teenage days are back. She can't help dancing to some of the tunes, just like she used to do in happier times. She looks at herself in the mirror and is amazed to notice that she is prettier than she thought she is. She notices her long neck, a beauty mark to the left of her mouth, the fullness of her lips, the curls of her hair. She notices what's lacking. She smiles, and surprises herself.

Today, a man brings her a parcel. She signs, and quickly opens it up. It's a beautiful red dress. She is startled. How could she wear something that bright! She stares at it, confused, terrified. She looks at the dustbin. She looks at the dress she is wearing, dull, dark, gloomy. She imagines how beautiful she would look when she wears it. She would buy a set of red earrings that go with it. When she would go out wearing the dress, people would look at her, and look at her twice. And while she is lost in her open-eyed dreams, her lips curve into a smile. 

"Excuse me.", someone says, and she is  stirred out of her dream. 

She giggles like a little girl and blushes.

A man takes a deep breath of relief as he secretly watches his friend's widow rediscovering her charm.